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Parenting is a beautiful contradiction. A push and pull, the of shedding parts that no longer serve us, losing ourselves and finding more of ourselves. Without a doubt, parenting is the ultimate highway to personal growth. And nothing brings our shadows into focus more than the reflections our children offer. While we try to teach our children all about life, it is our children who often unknowingly teach us what life is all about. Here are some lessons we can learn from our children.
We live in a society where we seem to cherish material achievements more than anything. It is easy to get lost into illusions, such as the belief that you can only be happy when you will achieve X and Y. We all too often forget that life is about what is happening now. Pure joy comes from the small and sometimes unexpected things. Small children show us this daily: the happiness on their face when they see you, the joy when they play a game. Small children don’t need lots of material things in order to be happy, they just need our attention and our love.
We all too often carry prejudices and fears of what people may think or say about us. Sometimes this is one of the main reason why we don’t let ourselves live a fulfilling life. In this respect, it is worthwhile taking the time to watch your children or to remember when they were small. Children truly enjoy themselves, laugh, and have fun because they are not worrying or watching out for what people think or say about them. They live in the moment and enjoy life to the full
Someone once said: when we lose our sense of curiosity, it’s almost like we die a little inside. Therefore, continue to ask the simple questions and to be curious about life, enjoying the process of learning new things, and remember that curiosity leads us towards self-fulfilment, to start asking questions again! The average child is said to ask 100 questions a day. How many to ask?
Adults don’t often speak freely. We’re afraid of our words being misinterpreted or worse still rejected, or of what other people will say, or of bothering other people. When we always say what we think other people want to hear, and not what we really think or feel, we don’t feel good inside. Children often show us how to express ourselves sincerely without feeling guilty about respecting others needs and boundaries. Their blunt honesty is often refreshing, even humorous, because there is never any ill will attached and we sense this.
Have you ever seen a child fall without getting up? Life works the same way. It’s usually our minds that limit us. Our fear of failing often anchors us to the spot, and so we cease to move forward along the path ahead.
It is important to be aware that children often trigger wounds from our past. Take the time needed to reflect on your own self-development. We are parents who are healing generational wounds and shaping future generations. To create a more connected and emotionally healthy world, we must walk hand-in-hand with the child-parts of ourselves and the little humans who we are parenting. When we bridge the gap, we realize that we aren’t that different. In fact, we are on the exact same team, learning and growing together.
If you are curious to know more about your inner child and to learn how to stop reacting to triggers, I highly recommend reading Healing your lost inner child, by Robert Jackman.
